I’ve been talking a lot lately about setting goals and keeping them, as well as, things you’ll face as you try to achieve your goals. Anytime we set goals there are usually setbacks that accompany it. These setbacks are really just a test to see how much we want the end result of our goals. But, sometimes thinking of it that way doesn’t always help. Sometimes we need a bit more help than a comforting thought. To that end, I’d like to talk about some things you can do when you feel down and want to quit.

Discovering the Problem

The first thing you have to do is stop, drop, and think. Seriously. The minute you realize you’re feeling down about your financial situation, stop what you’re doing, and sit down for a few minutes to think.

- Identify the problem.

You need to understand exactly what it is that’s bothering you. Most surface problems have an underlying cause, so you may have to look a little deeper. If you’re concerned that you can’t make the mortgage payment, there could be a couple of causes for that. 1.) You’ve overextended yourself and have too much house. 2.) You’re not satisfied with the money you’re making at your job. Your goal in this session is to figure out what’s bothering you.

Remember: Without a problem, you can’t make a goal; without a goal you can’t take action; and without action, there is no mental healing.

- Write it down.

This helps to get it out of your head and into the tangible. You now have something to focus on, something you can look at objectively and create solutions for. Say the problem is that you’ve overextended yourself. Well, now that you know, you can solve it. Sell the house, get rid of an expensive vehicle, or come up with some other way to get your expenses within your means. If you’re dissatisfied with your pay, maybe you should ask for a raise, look for another job, or if you really want to stop pussyfooting around the issue, get yourself some training for what you really want to do and just do it!

You may not like the solution, but sometimes we have to do things we don‘t like to reach our goals. Dawn over at Fighting Foreclosure works multiple jobs to reach her goals. She probably doesn’t like it very much, but she knows it’ll get her where she needs to be in the long run.

Remember Your Quality of Life

We all have challenges, particularly financial ones. The trick to overcoming them is to remember that you’ve got a life to live here. So you got knocked off the horse, dust yourself off and try again.

Remember: There is no failure except in no longer trying. (Elbert Hubbard)

If you sat down and thought of what was really bothering you and came away with an entire list of irritations and frustrations, don’t panic. It’s easy to overwhelm ourselves thinking of all the things we have to do. Fortunately, not everything on your list has to be tackled at once.

- Frustration and hopelessness.

We’ve all been here. Your thoughts just swirl in your head with no place to go and you can’t seem to focus. Even the simplest of tasks seem impossible and you just can’t seem to enjoy what life has given you. First and foremost, understand that these thoughts are normal and you’re not alone in feeling them. Secondly, don’t let them take over. Acknowledge their existence and move on. Remember your goals.

- Focus on your happiness.

As I said, the trick with overcoming your frustrations and the feelings of wanting to quit, are to remember that you’ve got a life to live. It’s imperfect, but it’s the only one you’ve got so you might as well enjoy it while you can. Money doesn’t make people happy – despite what many of you have argued when I’ve said this before. Make a list of what does make you happy and put it on your refrigerator. Incorporate these activities into your daily routine if you can, but refer to this list when the temptation to give up is strong. Sometimes, just thinking about the happy times can drastically improve your mood.

- Use positive language.

We’ve talked about this before. Positive language and thoughts can brighten your outlook on things. Maybe you’ve got more month than money this time around and you’re angry and confused. Acknowledge the thoughts, and focus on the positive. You’re healthy, you have a job, and you’re capable of finding a solution. Don’t dwell on the negative because it’s not going to help matters any.

- Think in opportunities.

When one door closes, another opens. Each time we’re told ‘no’ on something, it opens up an opportunity for something better. We just have to be astute enough to realize it.

- Dress well.

Yes, you read that correctly. It’s easy to feel sorry for ourselves when we look like bums. But, when we dress with purpose, we often feel as though we have a purpose. So, on those days where you don’t think you can even get out of bed because you feel sorry for yourself, get up and get dressed. You’ll feel better.

- Get outside.

Staying cooped up indoors doesn’t really help our frame of mind when we’re feeling down. And going out doesn’t mean you have to spend money, which incidentally, is one of the reasons people give for staying home. There are lots of activities you can do that don’t cost a thing, such as rounding up some friends for flag football, dodge ball, or even Frisbee in the park. Try to find things in your area that you can do for free if you’re worried about money. But, even beyond that, get some exercise. Endorphins make you happy. Happy people don’t want to quit.

- Laugh and smile, even when you don’t feel like it.

Laughing and smiling can greatly improve your mood. Even if you don’t feel like doing either, give it a try. Technically it’s a sneaky way to go about things, tricking your body into thinking you’re happy. But, as far as tricks go, this is pretty harmless. Put in your favorite comedy, invite some friends over for charades, or whatever makes you laugh. It’s funny how being happy will give you a better perspective on your situation.

Living Frugal

There are any number of websites specifically related to living frugal. If you’re feeling down, you’re only a click away from any one of them and you’ll see that many others are struggling with the same things. They also have plenty of tips to help you make it through the months when money’s short and times are hard. For some great ideas on frugal living, check out Kelly at Almost Frugal as she shares some tips on living drastically frugal during those months when there are more days than money left over.

Now it’s your turn. What advice or tips can you give to those struggling not to quit? What did you do or say to yourself that kept you on your path?

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